THE ELDARIN LADIES' ANTHEM to the tune of ANY MAN OF MINE Performed by Shania Twain (as sung by Luthien, Galadriel, and Arwen) Sunday, January 23, 2000 by William H. Hsu LUTHIEN: Any man of mine better risk his life for me Even when he's dead he better still adore me, And he better whup anybody in the land Even fightin' with one hand GALADRIEL: Any man of mine'll never raise a fuss If I sail into the West and leave him in the dust And he better pretend that he really don't see That I'm flirtin' with Gimli ARWEN: And if I'm distant kin And older than him I wanna hear him say, yeah (yeah) yeah (yeah) Yeah, I like it that way CHORUS (ALL) Any man of mine Better talk real fine Better tell me he can see my Elven beauty shine I need a man who'll leave The choices up to me He's gotta be a dignified full-of-pride Grand-bearin' stone-wearin' kind Any man of mine... GALADRIEL: Any man of mine had better live in a tree If he wants to rule the Silvan Elves with me But it'd better be absolutely crystal clear That I wear the pants around here ARWEN: And if we're engaged Fourteen thousand days I wanna hear him say, yeah (yeah) yeah (yeah) Yeah, I like it that way (CHORUS: ALL) SOLO: ARWEN Any man of mine Better bide his time Better come from the ancient kings and renew their line I need a man who fights With Numenorean might [*] He's gotta be a doom-driven long-livin' Orc-huntin' Dunadan kind Any man of mine... ARWEN: Let me hear you say yeah (ARAGORN: yeah) GALADRIEL: Yeah (CELEBORN: yeah) LUTHIEN: Yeah, I like it that way MODULATION: (BEREN: any man...) (CELEBORN: any man...) (ARAGORN: any man!) (CHORUS: ALL) You gotta start a little quest, Middle-earth's best, Kick, turn, stomp stomp, then you jump, heel-to-toe do-si-do 'Til your soul needs a rest 'til you really wanna sail west Keep it movin' 'til you ain't got the zest, anymore, Come on everybody, on the floor, a-one, two, a-three four (SOLO: ARWEN) [*] aficionados of the "Arwen, Warrior Princess" controversy (read: trolls) may substitute "But not as well as I"