WHERE IN EA IS MS. UNGWE LIANTE? to the tune of WHERE IN THE WORLD IS CARMEN SANDIEGO? by Sean Altman and David Yazbek, performed by Rockappella (as sung by Littleheart son of Bronweg) Wednesday, March 5, 2003 by Banazir ibn Ranugad al-Galbasi (Lead-in) Well, she's crawled across the world from Udun to Ezellohar She's an octopodal archfoe from Falas to Formenos She'll drive you from the valleys right into the Bay of Balar Tell me, where in Eä is Ms. Ungwë Liante? (Solo) Snuck in from the South of Arda, found the pass in the Pelóri, While she out-wove the Weaver with her wicked webs of gloom With a double dose of death doused the lights of Kementári, Tell me, where in Eä is Ms. Ungwë Liante? She roamed from Ringil to Helcar, dwelt in dark Avathar The expanse of Ered Gorgoroth she tracks! Well she snacked on Elf and Man, put the /gurth/ in Nan Dungortheb Then said "bye, Beleriand" when she moseyed to Mordor She turned the reverb up in Lammoth when she put the moves on Morgoth Tell me, where in Eä is Ms. Ungwë Liante? O, tell me, where in Arda is... o tell me, where can she be? Ooooh... Valinor to Endor, Harad via Gondor, from Dimbar to Umbar, Tol Sirion, Dol Guldur! (Bridge) Well she waddles 'round the world, and she makes the Balrogs batty She's a gluttonous gem-gobbler with a lust for Silmarils Her great belly's bloated up with Shelob's long-legged daddy Tell me, where in Eä is Ms. Ungwë Liante? Wo-oh-ah, tell me, where in Eä is Ms. Ungwë Liante? Where in Eä is Ms. Ungwë Liante? (O tell me) Where in Eä is Ms. Ungwë Liante? (Where could she be?) (Repeat to fade)