WHERE THE SHADOWS LIE
to the tune of AMERICAN PIE (Don McLean)

Saturday, July 29, 2000
by Ecthelion (reaganite2@juno.com)

A long, long age ago,
I can still remember how
my magic ring used to make me smile.
But I knew if he had that ring
then no one else would want to sing,
'Cause Sauron's voice is...really vile

His Dark Riders made me shiver
but what else could I consider?
Going on to Mordor
I couldn't take one more score

I can't remember if I tried 
to find out if Balrogs really fly,
but Gandalf didn't even try
the day the Wizard fried.

To Mordor where the shadows lie
With my Sam, who I scammed
Doesn't really know why,
If he had to know more
I'd just have to lie 
He'd sing that'll be the day that I fry,
So that'll be the day that I die.

Did you write the Book of Lore
'Bout silly elves and Numenor
How they got us in this mess?
Can you believe they won't confess?
Must be Protestants I guess...
A jerk named Feanor started the rest
          
Add later the pride of numenor
The first is dead, the isle no more
But they left behind this stupid ring,
Now all I can hear is Sauron sing.

Merry's a lonely tweenage Bradybuck
Pip's a sturdy chap with lots o' pluck,
but they'd both be out of luck
Where the shadow's lie